This was a couple years ago. I am not currently on a health kick.
I'm on a health kick. Again. This morning I made myself a breakfast smoothie for work. Smoothies are a very recent addition to my diet. I always make them with yogurt, frozen berries, and milk. This morning, I decided to add ice because I thought "slushy for breakfast."
At my desk, I take a swig of my smoothie, nothing happens. It's too thick. It's all stuck at the bottom of the cup. I tip the cup up higher. Still nothing happens.
So what do I do? Do I go get a spoon, or dig for a straw? The office kitchen has everything, I'm sure it has straws. For that matter, I'm sure if I looked around my desk I could find one. But no, that would be smart. Instead, I tip it higher and give it a shake.
Next thing I know I have the entire smoothie, in cup shape, sitting on top of my face. It's up my nose, it's running towards my ears, it's all down the front of my clothes. It's a f*cking mess! I am a f*cking mess!
I tip what I can back into the cup and spend the next five minutes cleaning myself up with Kleenexes in my cube. At which point I'm in a decent enough state to go to the kitchen for a good scrubbing.
Thank whoever is holy I decided to wear a blue dress. It was a blueberry/blackberry smoothie. Exact same colour. Also thankful I'm no longer blowing blueberry seeds out my nose.
I'm on a health kick. Again. This morning I made myself a breakfast smoothie for work. Smoothies are a very recent addition to my diet. I always make them with yogurt, frozen berries, and milk. This morning, I decided to add ice because I thought "slushy for breakfast."
At my desk, I take a swig of my smoothie, nothing happens. It's too thick. It's all stuck at the bottom of the cup. I tip the cup up higher. Still nothing happens.
So what do I do? Do I go get a spoon, or dig for a straw? The office kitchen has everything, I'm sure it has straws. For that matter, I'm sure if I looked around my desk I could find one. But no, that would be smart. Instead, I tip it higher and give it a shake.
Next thing I know I have the entire smoothie, in cup shape, sitting on top of my face. It's up my nose, it's running towards my ears, it's all down the front of my clothes. It's a f*cking mess! I am a f*cking mess!
I tip what I can back into the cup and spend the next five minutes cleaning myself up with Kleenexes in my cube. At which point I'm in a decent enough state to go to the kitchen for a good scrubbing.
Thank whoever is holy I decided to wear a blue dress. It was a blueberry/blackberry smoothie. Exact same colour. Also thankful I'm no longer blowing blueberry seeds out my nose.
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